on my own

Do not let others down for they have placed their hopes on you. I have let a lot of people down today, and worse of all, myself. I was under so much duress that I didn't know where I was heading to. I have clearly lost focus, hence resulting in my haphazardness.

I know my goals and aims, but I don't know the process. I must be more focused from now on. I don't know why but I seem rather willing to take on new tasks, happy to avoid my own, giving myself excuses.

However, all is not lost today. It didn't end with, 'I had chosen wrongly' and 'it doesn't work', but rather 'you had some qualities in there' and 'you're ahead and there is potential in it'. I am thankful for the glimmer of hope, the uplifting of spirit and the faith. I no longer want to disappoint myself, to lose myself in all this chaos. The weeks ahead are going to be tough, and I know what I need to deliver. I may now be on my own, but not entirely.

The show has just started.